Twelve Years Without You!

Today marks 12 years since we lost our stillborn twins, Zachary and Zoe, at 26 weeks. After five years of fertility consultations, prayers, hope, and heartbreak, they were our first miracle. We dreamed of the life we would have with them, but instead we had to say goodbye far too soon. Over the years, I've learned that grief doesn't follow a timeline. Some anniversaries are easier than others. Some bring quiet reflection, while others, like today, are filled with emotion. You can never predict how you'll feel when this day comes around. Today, I find myself wondering who Zachary and Zoe would be at 12 years old. Would they be as active as their younger sister, Zarah? Would they share her love of swimming, her determination, and her joy for life? I'll never know, and that's one of the hardest parts of loss, missing not only the children you lost, but the people they might have become. Today, I honour their memory by saying their names. Zachary. Zoe. You were loved from the very beginning, and you are loved still. Gone too soon. Loved forever. Remembered always. 💙🩷

Our turn has come...

For so many years, I stood on the sidelines watching other parents cheer for their children, wondering if God would ever write that story for me. I celebrated with friends, smiled through the ache, and quietly prayed for the day when I would have a child of my own to encourage, support, and love. Through the long and often painful journey of infertility, there were moments when the wait felt overwhelming, but God remained faithful even when I couldn't see what He was doing behind the scenes. Now, as I watch Zarah play hockey, thrive in competitive swimming, dance with confidence in hip hop, and lift her voice in choir, I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God. Every practice, every match, every race, every performance, and every song she sings feels like a tangible reminder of His faithfulness. These aren't just activities filling our calendar. They are answered prayers unfolding before our eyes. There was a time when we wondered if we would ever hear someone call us "Mom or Dad." Now we get to stand on the sidelines, sit in the audience, and cheer from the crowd as our daughter discovers her gifts and passions. Each moment carries a significance that only those who have walked the road of infertility and infant loss truly understand. Watching Zarah on the hockey field, giving her all with determination and courage, fills our hearts with pride. Seeing her thrive in the pool through competitive swimming personally reminds me of the strength and perseverance God has placed within her. Watching her shine in hip hop brings so much joy as she expresses herself with confidence and freedom. And hearing her sing in choir, raising her voice, is one of the most beautiful reminders that God has turned years of longing into songs of gratitude. To many, these may seem like ordinary childhood moments. But to us, they are sacred and we remain unapologetic to it. They are evidence of God's grace and faithfulness. They are the moments we once imagined through tears, never knowing if they would become our reality. The years of waiting were not easy, but they taught us to trust God's timing, even when I felt like I didn't understand His plans. Looking back now, I can see His hand through every step of the journey. Today, I stand with a heart full of gratitude, knowing that the child we prayed so earnestly for is growing, thriving, and becoming exactly who God created her to be. After years of yearning, hoping, and believing, we're finally living the answered prayer we once carried deep in our hearts. Every hockey game, every swimming gala, every hip hop performance, and every choir song is a reminder that God is faithful. And as we watch Zarah embrace all that she loves, I quietly thank Him each time for the privilege of being her mom and for the miracle of finally having my own place among the parents cheering from the sidelines. "The Lord has done great things for us, and we are filled with joy." Psalm 126:3 ❤️🙏🏻✨

It's your big day...Happy Birthday Princess!

On the Eve of Zarah's 11th Birthday 🌈

Tomorrow, our rainbow baby turns eleven. As I sit and reflect today, my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude for a journey that once seemed impossible. Eleven years ago, we were given words no parent is ever prepared to hear. We were told there was little hope. Yet, while the doctors saw limits, God saw purpose. While others saw impossibility, He was writing a miracle. Our beautiful Zarah, same as her twin siblings, Zachary and Zoe, began her journey as a tiny fighter. From the very beginning, she carried a strength far beyond her size and years. Her life has been a testament to resilience, courage, and unwavering determination. Tomorrow, we will celebrate more than a birthday. We will celebrate every battle fought, every milestone reached, every tear turned into joy, and every moment that brought us to this point. We will celebrate a little girl who taught us that hope is not the absence of fear, but the courage to keep believing despite it. Zarah is our rainbow after the storm, a splash of colour painted across some of our darkest skies. She is living proof that miracles still happen, that faith can carry us through uncertainty, and that sometimes the smallest warriors leave the greatest impact on the world. My sweet girl, if you ever wonder who you are, know this: you are stronger than the odds that stood against you, brighter than any doubt that surrounded you, and more loved than words could ever express. Tomorrow you turn eleven, but today we pause in awe of the journey that brought you here. What a privilege it has been to watch you grow, to hear your laughter, to witness your courage, and to call you our daughter. You were born from hope, raised in love, and destined to shine. 🌈✨❤️